A Sure Bet September 23

I detect a lurch coming on. We’ve had two days to prepare but comms are still running around like headless chickens getting the story together on how effective we are at ASB.

The chief has seen the HMIC report that will undoubtedly rekindle all the attacks on the police over ‘yobs taking control’ and ‘the police can’t be bothered with nuisance behaviour’.

The chief reckons there have been so many discussions about how we record ASB, with so many classifications that no-one can remember exactly how many there are at any one time. Our performance analyst is even studying for a PHD in measuring low level criminality such is the complexity of it all. When the chief read the report, it was a good job there wasn’t anyone easily
offended by bad language in earshot as it apparently says we can’t define ASB.

I know it is just coincidence but this week was the deadline on the consultation for proposals on Police and Crime Commissioners, the chief’s printer has almost given up the ghost with all the revisions to submissions over the last week.

The police authority chair has been rather vociferous on getting the chief’s perspective on his response but he’s been wrapped up with ensuring ACPO’s submission makes sure there’s no chance PCCs will be able to muscle in on his territory.

The dep has just got back from a conference and huddled with the chief on the ACPO response. While he was away, he reckons the Policing Minister was like a mischievous boy having let off a stink bomb and was watching through the window giggling at everyone holding their noses. The dep swears he was muttering ‘No more fiefdoms now’ as he left the building.

I have bet him £50 the ASB report will be used as justification for PCCs this week; you can always tell when political opportunity comes rolling by.

Yours

Stitch